15th October, 2014
By Sharon Jane Akinyemi
What is the attraction? Most times I ask guys that are in”Love” this important question; The answer isn’t usually complete without the phrase “She is pretty, she has nice physique. Then am like- is that all there is, aren’t there inward endowments to look out for, what if she is not as good looking inside (the heart)?
These outward endowments obviously are what some ladies concentrate on grooming and building, forgetting that the worth and value of every person is actually what resides on the inside. I think it’s high time we began to focus more of what’s inward than outward.
So, What Is Self Esteem?
In psychology, the term self-esteem is used to describe a person’s overall sense of self-worth or personal value. Self-esteem is often seen as a personality trait, which means that it tends to be stable and enduring. Self-esteem can involve a variety of beliefs about the self, such as the appraisal of one’s own appearance, beliefs, emotions and behaviours.
Components of Self-Esteem
According to one definition (Braden, 1969), there are three key components of self-esteem:
•Self-esteem is an essential human need that is vital for survival and normal, healthy development.
•Self-esteem arises automatically from within based upon a person’s beliefs and consciousness.
•Self-esteem occurs in conjunction with a person’s thoughts, behaviours, feelings and actions.
The need for self-esteem plays an important role in psychologist Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, depicting self-esteem as one of the basic human motivations. Maslow suggested that people need both esteem from other people as well as inner self-respect. Both of these needs must be fulfilled in order for an individual to grow as a person and achieve self-actualisation.
It is important to note that self-esteem is a concept distinct from self-efficacy, which involves the belief in future actions, performance or abilities. The synonyms of self-esteem include self-worth, self-respect and self-value
We all have those days where we look in the mirror and wish we could change what we saw. But you know what? We shouldn’t. Every one (especially women) should love their body, regardless of their weight, height, hair colour, whatever. Unfortunately, it’s usually easier said than done. Accepting your flaws and loving yourself can be kind of tough for some of us.
But after all these years, I have come to the conclusion that a healthy, positive body image is hard to find, and neither caftans nor liposuction nor photoshopping is the answer.
Through the centuries plump was pleasing. Extra body weight proved that you had the money to eat more than enough. At the turn of the twentieth century, thin became the “in.” The wealthy ate in an elegant , controlled, leisurely fashion. Perhaps we should hope for a cultural curves revival. Larger women may be riding the crest of the next wave of popular style!
But as we speak it has taken a new turn. There is really a connection between self esteem and our weight. Yes! This is true because being overweight causes social and psychological problems for many people. It affects their lifestyle and the way they feel about themselves .An overweight friend shared her struggles with obesity with me.
“There is no way I can tell you how my life has changed since I became fat. Until I was thirty nine years old, I was slim, attractive, self confident, and successful in my career. Then I quit drinking and going to bars every night. When I did,I began to crave sweets. So I started eating ice-cream instead of natural fruit juices. I ate about two large bowls every two to three days. Before I knew it, I had gained sixty kilograms. I quit my job because I couldn’t take the jokes, stares and disgusted looks of my coworkers and customers. I began to stay at home all the time, not wanting to be seen in public.
“When I went shopping for necessities, I used to look behind me to see if people were making fun of me. Sometimes they were! This pushed my hatred of being fat even more deeply into my subconscious mind. It was terrible! Even my own family put me through some humiliating experiences. My children tried to be kind, but they often remarked, ‘Mother, you sure are fat. Can’t you stop eating much?’ My husband is the only one who doesn’t mention my weight. But even if he doesn’t, I know what he is thinking, and I am ashamed for him to see me undressed. All of these tortures are only part of my problem. I have tried every diet I have heard about . At various times in the past in the past twenty years, I have joined weight-loss programmes, some costing nearly twenty thousand a month. I spent thousands of naira on medical bills and the medicines they recommended. Nothing has resulted in successful sustained weight loss.
“Every aspect of my life has changed since I gained weight. I won’t apply for a job even though I could help my husband with our children school expenses. But I can’t face being rejected. I know no one would employ me. I’ve even stopped going to church. I’ve dropped out of everything I used to enjoy, and I just sit home and watch TV. I’m not physically able to use the stairs. With the slightest amount of physical labour, I become short of breath. My doctor told me I have high blood pressure and diabetes. And there seems to be no solution.”
Her interview ended with a question: “Do you have any suggestion for me?” I certainly did.
How To Eat Right
One of the most effective weight loss programmes is still good old-fashion eat right and exercise. The first step to successful dieting is to realise you must make a change in the way you eat-not a temporary fling but a permanent change. Long-term results should be your motivation. Next, set your goals. Decide how much you want to lose and how long you think it will take you. Lose weight slowly,never more than two kilogram each week. This will give you time to develop good eating habits that will last the rest of your life.
Here are some guidelines to use in selecting a good weight-loss programme:• Do not choose a diet that supplies less than 800-1000 calories a day for example tea with skim milk and whole-grain bread for breakfast (335 calories). Vegetable soup and medium wrap of wheat or unripe plantain meal for lunch(410) calories . And medium size apple or two servings of watermelon for dinner(100). Your body needs to be maintained, even while you are losing weight.
•Do not use a liquid diet as your only source of nutrient. Taking only liquids can cause the muscles of your intestine to get sluggish from under activity. Colon problems can result when you resume normal eating. A high protein liquid diet can cause a nutritional imbalance in the body. This can prevent the heart from being able to receive proper electrical impulses. The result can then be sudden death.
•Choose a diet that includes all of the basic food groups: fruits, vegetables, cereals, legumes,milk products, poultry, with sparing use of oils and fat. Your diet should be balanced, not high in anything.
•Do not ignore your own special health needs. Check with your doctors before beginning the diet to make sure it does not conflict with any medications or health problems you may have
WHAT ABOUT EXERCISE
The question should be rephrased to “How often do I get to work out?” This and others are some of the questions people ask me.
You can actually work out as often as your schedule allows! As far as training results, you need to exercise five or six days a week. The minimum will be three days a week, but that won’t contribute to much weight loss.
How long do I need to work out aech session to lose weight?
Aim for forty-five minutes of exercise six days a week, with one day off for rest and muscle renewal. Most of each session should be spent on your target heart rate. You can do the math to figure how much weight you will lose. If you burn 500 extra calories a day, it will take seven days to lose about half a kilogram. If you want faster weight loss, exercise more (both in the morning and evening). Or deduct 500 calories from each day’s menus. That will give you the recommended 1kg a week loss of fat. Anything more is water weight.
What should I do for more challenge?
If you have been exercising for a while, you may want to increase your fitness level. You can add interval training to your exercise session by interspersing short, intense burst of activity with the slower, sustained movement. Start with short intervals of intense exercise-fifteen to thirty seconds- and build up from there.
I do interval training, I walk, then jog. Sometimes I climb the stairs, then skip.
You can add fun to your work out by inviting another person to join you. That will sure serve as a motivation for you. But remember you need to begin you exercise session with a warm up. After warm-ups, begin your exercise then jog or run to a designated stop. But don’t stop there. Continue your reduced pace, then jog or run again. The winner is rewarded with a few extra calorie burned! Enjoy stimulating conversation while you cool down.
To achieve overall fitness, three components are important and these includes (1) Strength and toning,(2) aerobic endurance and (3) flexibility .
By understanding the role each component plays, you can design your own active lifestyle and become a calorie burning machine. Whether you choose to join a gym, get a personal trainer, or just engage in fun activities on a regular basis, you. Will have the knowledge to fine- tune your fitness to meet your personal goals.
Strength and Toning
Muscles are your body engine. They are metabolically active, and they not only burn calories during physical activities but also when your body is at rest. Increasing your muscle mass will increase your body capacity to burn calories. 1/2 kg of fat only burns about three calories per day. But 1/2 kg of muscle burns up to fifty calories! If you gain 1kg of muscle over the next year and nothing else changes you could lose about 5kg of body fat.
It’s been proven that diets , which significantly restrict you caloric intake, can cause the loss of lean muscle mass. Strength training helps maintain your lean muscle mass while you lose fat and it is excellent for toning and shaping the body and prevent injuries. It also helps in the following conditions: osteoporosis, arthritis, obesity, ageing, hypertension and high cholesterol .
To build strength a muscle must be overloaded or worked beyond it’s normal level. This overloading challenges your muscles on a regular basis and stimulate them to build stronger muscles.
Aerobic endurance
Fat burns best during aerobic activity. The word aerobic means to use oxygen. Large muscle sustained activities are considered aerobic because we can sustain them for long periods of time with out running out of oxygen. When the activity is isolated to a single muscle group, as in weight lifting, or when we exercise so hard we become winded, this is considered anaerobic, or without oxygen.
Aerobic endurance is a measure of how fit your heart and lungs are. Aerobic exercise causes you to breath more rapidly and your heart to pump more quickly. With regularity your body will respond with lower body fat, heart rate, cholesterol level and blood pressure. Another positive benefit is increased energy and endurance.
Let me conclude by saying I have learned a lot about what makes men and women feel attractive as they age. And by that I don’t mean which over-the-counter remedy works best or how to get just the right nip or tuck that leads to looking like a model on a magazine cover. What I mean is what really works from the inside out for real men and women who want to look great at any age.
Choose a diet that includes an exercise programme. Physical exercise will help to strengthen your muscles and prevent flabby, sagging skin that makes you look older.
Let’s connect @ [email protected] or send me a personal message at www.facebook.com/BodyConfidenceFitnessClub